Sometimes its too much to take.

All the load and all the expectations, others’ too but more importantly my own.  It feels like the weight of the thousand earths on your shoulder to bear. Darkness clouds my eyes from all directions as I think about the gargantuan task that lies ahead. 

I look at my decade’s goals and they appear impossible. 

I plan the year ending with a scary goal.
I get scared looking at the goal and all the unforeseen obstacles that arise.
Then I plan the month. I am a little less scared.
Then the week. 
Then tomorrow. 

I take one step ahead of the other. I condition my mind to do the unpleasurable. I condition my mind to talk the right things that I feel are right. I condition myself to avoid social niceties – the root cause of mediocrity and the fear of embarrassment. I condition myself to just f*king execute the day’s plan , whether or not I feel like it. “Feeling like it” is irrelevant . Totally disconnected from hope, enthusiasm, motivation, fatigue and its peers. 

Similarly perfection is over-rated. To violently execute rather than languish in planned hesitation. That is my everyday theme. So I force myself to get on with it. To make that last phone call. To write that last e-mail. To bullet the last slide on the tomorrow’s PPT. There is a reason its called “Entrepreneurshit” and its not all pretty. 

Whether I succeed or fail, I know I stood tall for a cause I believed in . I know I didn’t let my intention to manifest a Clean powered world die and fade away inside me. I know I shall not lay down and die and will go down swinging if I have to , on my glorious burden to make sure that renewable powered world comes to life.

I know I will keep marching , regardless of whether I get to where I want to, because some causes are even worth failing for. I know I would have succeeded either way , because my place will never be among those cold and timid souls, who know neither victory nor defeat. 

So I tip my hat , to those who have the courage , to Just keep marching.